Personality characteristics can be perceived both positively and negatively, and this usually depends on the person you ask. Yet there are some that cause more eye rolling and cringing than others. Is it because they are actually traits that cause more harm than good, or is it our own misperception of them that puts them into these predetermined “good” or “bad” categories? The 6 personality traits highlighted below are not necessarily loathed by all, but they are those that could clash with some very particular personalities and thus are worth mentioning.
Do we love to hate them? You be the judge!
You might have worked with someone who adopted the “my way or the highway” attitude a little too intensely. This can definitely cause friction with those who like to reinvent, challenge the status quo, or adapt their approach to each person. For these people, rigidity can be seen as a lack of competence, or even an inability to change, improve or see others’ ideas as constructive.
Nevertheless, there are some responsibilities and positions where a certain level of rigidity can be advantageous.
So before knocking this trait, you might want to understand your own personality and whether or not you are just hating this characteristic because it just so happens to be the opposite of you.
Our jobs expose us to many different types of people; people we sometimes need to collaborate with on a regular basis in order to get tasks completed and projects delivered. If employees were all built the same way, with similar approaches to things and identical styles of communication and behavior, would this necessarily be a good thing?
Along the same lines as rigidity, skeptics are a lot harder to convince and win over. But a true, extreme skeptic will not only question everything and dig, but can let their suspiciousness and distrust get in the way of relationships and potential projects.
This might be where some loathe this personality trait because it’s almost a full-time job trying to get them to see the positive side of things. Working with an excessively skeptical person may have also left you feeling insecure or even doubting yourself and your potential. So don’t let it rub off on your optimism.
There’s a difference between expressing your disagreement or point of view vs acting on impulse and exploding in the moment. You can guess that the latter is linked to the intolerance trait, where emotions and frustrations get the better of you and the result is reacting before reflecting. This can lead to a lot of regret and mood swings, which doesn’t exactly benefit a working relationship.
You may find these co-workers unbearable, especially if you have trouble with confrontation and conflict resolution. The good news: tolerance can develop with experience and age.
We live in an extrovert’s world, where outgoing, demonstrative people are usually seen as an image of power and confidence. Their social-easiness brings energy and an approachableness that can be less evident in introverts, which can lead to people misinterpreting them as being uninterested, cold or even less of a contributor to the team. So do you really dislike introverts, or do you dislike what you THINK you know about introverts?
If you are extroverted, this may amplify your image of introverts as being dull and lonesome. So avoid putting a label on them when you first meet them. Once you get inside their bubble, you might find yourself surprised by how much you actually enjoy their company and by their hard work that can sometimes go unnoticed.
I am fascinated by people. But most of all, I am fascinated by what drives their behavior, the elements underneath what they portray on the surface. Sometimes I can’t help but think of how differently people can experience the same event.
The assertive personality trait, although encompassing many strengths, can sometimes intimidate others. Those who want to keep the peace, avoid confrontation or who are simply not at ease with conflict or disagreeing with people can find assertiveness overwhelming, even unnecessary at times.
Of course, when assertive becomes aggressive, this can lead to even more resentment. But what exactly do you hate about this trait? Is it the dominant, forceful tendencies? Have you had experience with someone assertive who was against your decision and had the confidence to tell you to your face? Or have you seen one too many assertive people go beyond an acceptable level of self-assurance and become disruptive?
Whatever the case, find out if your frustration is justifiable, or if an assertive person is just bringing out an insecurity you might have about yourself and dealing with conflict.
This trait can go so many ways. Someone overly dependent may always look to others for support, for knowledge, for motivation and even to help boost their own self-worth. They might need people to call the shots, make final decisions, or direct them on where they need to go. This can drain the energy of those who surround overly dependent people, not to mention the managers who will have to oversee them.
Part of successful leadership is helping others grow and be self-sufficient, which isn’t always obvious when dealing with employees that constantly need a push, support or validation.
So the question isn’t whether or not you hate certain personality characteristics, it’s why you think you hate them. Although many can be more disruptive or counter-productive, sometimes the animosity towards them is stemming from your own personality or opposite tendencies. Nevertheless, if you still find yourselves disliking some personality characteristics, the key thing is to find a constructive and safe way to deal with them. Think in terms of a solution, of gaining more information and of understanding your own natural reflexes.
What have you done in your organization to reduce such hatred among employees?